What Is My Dream?
About 2 weeks ago, I bought this beautiful book. I mean beautiful in every sense of the word. Its illustrations are beautiful and its words are beautiful. Everything about it is beautiful. It's called Start Today and after reading through half of the simple, yet compelling pages, I read, "You can decide how much distance there will be between the life you have and the life you want." A few pages later, "Get good at recognizing your dream. Get so good that when it is arriving, you can see it coming and run to meet it."
I know I've heard some version of these words before, but they resounded deep within my soul as I read them anew. I pondered what they truly meant to me. It then prodded the question, "What is my dream?"
So what is my dream? At first, all I could think was, "I don't know....many things." But, as I've continued to think about this, I realized a few things that are my dream.
My dream is to love God more than anything. I want to have so much faith that I doubt my doubts first and not Him. I want to come to the place where I trust Him completely and wholly. I want to love Him so well that I am willing to do whatever He says, not necessarily without questions, but without fear. I want to love Him enough to know that He will not be disappointed in me. Disappointment is worse than anger in my book. I want to love Him well enough so that when I meet Him, His arms will be outstretched and He will say, "Well done, Katherine." I want to love Him purer than I've ever loved.
My dream is also to be a good mother and loving wife. This may sound cliche, but I feel this. I deeply desire to be a good mother, a good wife, a good daughter, sister, aunt, and I fear I won't be. I want to be able to teach my children the scriptures and the importance of temples and that treating each other with love and respect is the only way to live. I especially want Heavenly Father to see my efforts and know that I am trying. I want to know about myself that I am trying my absolute hardest. My greatest desire, or dream, is to see God and the Savior face to face and know that I am good. That I did okay. More than okay. That they, again, are not disappointed.
My dream is the yearning I feel to be an active member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints my whole life. I have learned too much and have had too many eye-opening, faith-building, and miraculous experiences to let those go in a bout of disobedience or neglect. This Church and my membership means everything to me and in order to fully understand me, you essentially need to understand what the Gospel is.
My dream is to keep dancing. I love to dance. I cannot say this enough. I have been dancing for 13 years and I don't plan on stopping anytime soon. Every time a good rhythm or soulful song comes on, it takes all I can to not get up and dance. And why shouldn't I continue with something I love so much? I truly believe that this is something Heavenly Father has blessed me with as a gift and a talent. I know for me that I need to personally continue to develop these. I thank the Lord that He blessed me with something that brings me so much vitality and joy. And more especially, with the exceptional friends I've made while doing it.
My dream is to continue to use my academic brain. What I mean by this is that there is a difference between a formal education and an informal education and I just have to express my thankfulness for my formal college education. I loved pushing myself in hard classes and seeing myself succeed. It was empowering. I also loved that my opinion was challenged OFTEN by professors, peers, and mentors. It opened my eyes to many new and exciting ideas that I would have never given the chance to think about if it hadn't been for their instruction. Thank goodness for those teachers who had patience enough to deal with students like me who thought they knew everything...or at least a whole lot. Ultimately, I would be awfully sad if I let go of that academic crave I feel when I want to learn something in a more aggressive or critical way.
My dream is to continue learning in a non-academic way. I want to gain skills and learn new things every day. About people, about jobs, about food, about experiences, about events, about places. I want to accomplish my "bucket list" items (which currently consists of things like learning to play the violin, learning how to use a pottery wheel, and learning/becoming fluent in several foreign languages) and do it in such a way where I can say, "I'm such a boss". (We all could use the confidence, right? :) ).
My dream is to work my way to a job that I love with all my heart. A job that I feel is truly changing the world and that has a cause that is dedicated to people's greatest, purest needs. I have realized now that I can only feel fulfilled in a work where I am truly committed to a valiant cause.
My dream is to become humble and thankful. I desire to gain the ability to recognize the Lord's hand in my life. The small and the large. I want to see His touch in everything I do and actually be outwardly and inwardly grateful for it. I want to have full conviction when I say, "I am nothing without the Lord."
My dream is to have my thoughts become the Lord's thoughts and my ways, His ways. In an Ensign article I read two days ago, Elder Lawrence E. Corbridge discussed how obedience allows us to do this. Becoming Christlike, developing a Godly character, and being fruitful are only accomplished through exact obedience. That is my dream.
I think it was initially difficult for me to formulate my dream because of the deep weight I place on the word "dream". In my mind, dream to me meant something that is unalterable, unchangeable. Once you have your "dream", there is no changing it. But this is not how life, nor our dreams work. Dreams, like ourselves, are transient and ever-changing. Dreams, like ourselves, reflect where we have been, what we have done, and who we are wishing/willing to become in the future. As this concept is not stagnant in life, it is not stagnant in dreams.
I've also realized that perhaps because I didn't know what my dream was right away, that may be cause for some worry. But I should tell you that my dream, especially within the last several months, has changed many times. This has been hard for me to accept, but I have felt even more lately how important it is to sometimes just live one day at a time. I honestly don't know what I will be doing in 6 months from now, but I do know what I will be doing tomorrow. Choosing to be happy now and starting today...sometimes it's the only thing we can do in this journey called life. Starting here, starting today is something I can do now. And this will help me develop into my dream. I am sure of it.
So what is my dream? At first, all I could think was, "I don't know....many things." But, as I've continued to think about this, I realized a few things that are my dream.
My dream is to love God more than anything. I want to have so much faith that I doubt my doubts first and not Him. I want to come to the place where I trust Him completely and wholly. I want to love Him so well that I am willing to do whatever He says, not necessarily without questions, but without fear. I want to love Him enough to know that He will not be disappointed in me. Disappointment is worse than anger in my book. I want to love Him well enough so that when I meet Him, His arms will be outstretched and He will say, "Well done, Katherine." I want to love Him purer than I've ever loved.
My dream is also to be a good mother and loving wife. This may sound cliche, but I feel this. I deeply desire to be a good mother, a good wife, a good daughter, sister, aunt, and I fear I won't be. I want to be able to teach my children the scriptures and the importance of temples and that treating each other with love and respect is the only way to live. I especially want Heavenly Father to see my efforts and know that I am trying. I want to know about myself that I am trying my absolute hardest. My greatest desire, or dream, is to see God and the Savior face to face and know that I am good. That I did okay. More than okay. That they, again, are not disappointed.
My dream is the yearning I feel to be an active member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints my whole life. I have learned too much and have had too many eye-opening, faith-building, and miraculous experiences to let those go in a bout of disobedience or neglect. This Church and my membership means everything to me and in order to fully understand me, you essentially need to understand what the Gospel is.
My dream is to keep dancing. I love to dance. I cannot say this enough. I have been dancing for 13 years and I don't plan on stopping anytime soon. Every time a good rhythm or soulful song comes on, it takes all I can to not get up and dance. And why shouldn't I continue with something I love so much? I truly believe that this is something Heavenly Father has blessed me with as a gift and a talent. I know for me that I need to personally continue to develop these. I thank the Lord that He blessed me with something that brings me so much vitality and joy. And more especially, with the exceptional friends I've made while doing it.
My dream is to continue to use my academic brain. What I mean by this is that there is a difference between a formal education and an informal education and I just have to express my thankfulness for my formal college education. I loved pushing myself in hard classes and seeing myself succeed. It was empowering. I also loved that my opinion was challenged OFTEN by professors, peers, and mentors. It opened my eyes to many new and exciting ideas that I would have never given the chance to think about if it hadn't been for their instruction. Thank goodness for those teachers who had patience enough to deal with students like me who thought they knew everything...or at least a whole lot. Ultimately, I would be awfully sad if I let go of that academic crave I feel when I want to learn something in a more aggressive or critical way.
My dream is to continue learning in a non-academic way. I want to gain skills and learn new things every day. About people, about jobs, about food, about experiences, about events, about places. I want to accomplish my "bucket list" items (which currently consists of things like learning to play the violin, learning how to use a pottery wheel, and learning/becoming fluent in several foreign languages) and do it in such a way where I can say, "I'm such a boss". (We all could use the confidence, right? :) ).
My dream is to work my way to a job that I love with all my heart. A job that I feel is truly changing the world and that has a cause that is dedicated to people's greatest, purest needs. I have realized now that I can only feel fulfilled in a work where I am truly committed to a valiant cause.
My dream is to become humble and thankful. I desire to gain the ability to recognize the Lord's hand in my life. The small and the large. I want to see His touch in everything I do and actually be outwardly and inwardly grateful for it. I want to have full conviction when I say, "I am nothing without the Lord."
My dream is to have my thoughts become the Lord's thoughts and my ways, His ways. In an Ensign article I read two days ago, Elder Lawrence E. Corbridge discussed how obedience allows us to do this. Becoming Christlike, developing a Godly character, and being fruitful are only accomplished through exact obedience. That is my dream.
I think it was initially difficult for me to formulate my dream because of the deep weight I place on the word "dream". In my mind, dream to me meant something that is unalterable, unchangeable. Once you have your "dream", there is no changing it. But this is not how life, nor our dreams work. Dreams, like ourselves, are transient and ever-changing. Dreams, like ourselves, reflect where we have been, what we have done, and who we are wishing/willing to become in the future. As this concept is not stagnant in life, it is not stagnant in dreams.
I've also realized that perhaps because I didn't know what my dream was right away, that may be cause for some worry. But I should tell you that my dream, especially within the last several months, has changed many times. This has been hard for me to accept, but I have felt even more lately how important it is to sometimes just live one day at a time. I honestly don't know what I will be doing in 6 months from now, but I do know what I will be doing tomorrow. Choosing to be happy now and starting today...sometimes it's the only thing we can do in this journey called life. Starting here, starting today is something I can do now. And this will help me develop into my dream. I am sure of it.
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